Teena’s Thoughts

I need to write this out because my heart is breaking really.

I know in the grand scheme of things, we aren’t bad off at all. But if you have no peace in your home because of an uncaring tenant in the basement, what kind of life is that? When the last place you want to go at night is to your home- is it still a home- or just the place that holds your stuff?

Don’t get me wrong. This has nothing to do with my family. I love my husband and children so much, and love to be with them. 

Last year, we had to sell our house.  We went through some financial difficulties, and were left with more debt, and a credit rating that sucks big time.  So we rented the house that we are presently in.  The basement is rented as well.  Everything was okay for the first 2 weeks. The tenant in the basement was a smoker, but as soon as we called her on it, she started smoking outside.  The lease states the home is non-smoking. Then, she decided to move one night. No notice or warning, she was just gone. 

So T(enant)2 moved in.  I think she was there for 3 days before she started complaining about the noise.  The noise of my kids playing, or any one of us walking across the floor. Then she started banging on the ceiling.  I was never so happy since moving in there as the day when our landlord told us she was moving out.  We ignored each other for 4 months until she moved.

T3 moves in… Is it possible that he is even worse than T2?  A noise complaint and 2 visits from the police would make it seem so.  Again it’s the noise. We have tried to explain to him that we aren’t trying to disturb him. I know it’s loud for him. We don’t have a t.v or a stereo, and the kids are in bed by 9:00 at the latest- what more can we do?  We try to keep the kids outside or upstairs as much as possible. We put rugs down in the living room and dining room.  He smokes, and doesn’t always go outside.  We complained and he denies it. 

Finally, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  We found a house that was very modestly priced. It’s in a good neighbourhood, and is not in need of a ton of work.  We can afford it but for 2 things- our credit rating and no down payment. DHs parents agree to help out.  We put an offer on the house, they countered offered, and we were okay with it. It almost seemed like a reality. Then we run in to the next problem.  The mortgage broker advised that my Ils would have to put the house in their name alone.  They’re scared. It’s a huge responsibility. They know that we almost lost the last house. And even though this house will carry for about 60% of the last one, they are worried.  They also don’t think that they could qualify for the mortgage because they are retired. Our real estate agent agrees on this point. 

I called the mortgage broker back, and she says that there is no way to include us on the deed.  I call another broker, and he says it might be possible.  Now I have to talk to DH.  I’m afraid to hope because there doesn’t seem to be a whole lot to have hope about.

Mostly, I’m just very sad.

I should say what isn't new as I haven't posted on here in a very long time! I had no idea it had been so long! 

The biggest thing that's new with me is my weightloss.  I joined Sparkpeople, and the support on there has been wonderful!  Sparkpeople. There are so many tools available on there that it's amazing that the site is completely free!  Here are a couple of before, and in progress pictures.  The after picture will take some time. :)

Before Picture #2

Before Picture #1

In Progress- down 16 lbs

In Progress -16 lbs

We left on Friday evening,  March 8th to visit DH's sister and family.  We finallly arrived the next day at about 2:00 p.m.! What a long drive. The kids were great though, I am so proud of them.  The weather was lovely on Saturday, and it rained on Sunday.  There was a mixture of sun and rain all week long. The warmer temperatures were causing the snow to start to melt so it wasn't condusive to a lot of outdoor activity. Nevertheless, we had fun.  Even with the kids and Charles having the flu, it was still fun. 

We picked BIL up from his latest trip on Monday. He is a truck driver, and we were glad that he could be home for the remainder of our stay.  We went shopping in Fredericton one day, and in Woodstock another day. For the most part, though, we just relaxed and spent time together.

With the warmer temperatures, the last thing we expected was snow. On Friday morning we began to prepare for our trip home. We were hoping to leave in the afternoon, so that the bulk of the drive would be through the night and the kids could sleep.  SIL got a phone call, and the caller mentioned the weather. We promptly checked the weather network, only to find that a winter storm was headed our way, and it was a bad one. No big deal, we had planned to leave Friday so that if the weather was bad it would still give us a little leeway. If we left Saturday, we would still have been home in plenty of time to be back at work on Monday morning.  Friday night,  we checked again, and a stretch of  the Transcanada Highway had been closed in Quebec. It would remain closed until Sunday momrning! 

Finally at 9:00 a.m. est, we were on our way! We arrived home on Monday morning at 4:00 a.m.. At 7:30 I had 3 kids who were well rested, wide awake and rearing to go!  I stayed home from work on Monday and on Tuesday we started getting back in to routine. We have decided that going to New Brunswick in March may not be the best plan for future, so next year we will go in the summer!

I hope you have a wonderful day sweetheart, and I hope that the year ahead is the continuation of good things for us.

Love Teena

Chatelaine Magazine nicely posted an article this month entitled "Breastfeeding Sucks".  I can't believe they would do that. I guess it shouldn't surprise me, both they and their sister magazine "Today's Parent" are regularly plastered with Formula ads.  As if breastfeeding needed another blow.  Even here in Canada where women can stay home with their babies for a full year, breastfeeding rates are low.  And why wouldn't they be?  Every obstetrician's office, ped's office, general practitioner's office, is fully stocked with samples and forms to send away for free samples.  We are told that "breast is best" but the government won't support breastfeeding clinics. 

I remember the 1st time I saw a baby being breastfed.  I think I was 6.  Before that I don't ever remember seeing this.  I was bottle fed, as were my siblings, and all my cousins.  However, when I saw that mother nursing her baby, I was in awe, and from that moment on I decided that is how I would feed my babies when I had them. Even my fantasy world with my dolls, and playing house with my sister, would include a nursing baby.  I want my daughter to grow up with the same conviction.  Breastfeeding is not easy, and I know it doesn't work for everyone. I just think it would go so much better and last so much longer, if there was the necessary support given. Breastfeeding in public shouldn't even cause an eyebrow to be raised unless it is in approval.  For those who are self conscious- as I was especially in the early days, there should always be a place provided for women to nurse their babies.  And formula samples should be banned or at least provided only to those who really need it.

Think of it this way. If a scientist created a nutritional substanse as wholesome and nourishing as breast milk, he or she would probably win a Nobel prize.  No one would question giving it to their children.  And yet just about every woman can do this for her child.  How sad it is that so many choose not to.  I don't consider myself a lactivist although I would like to be.  I try to understand when women say breastfeeding didn't work for them.  But then, I wonder too, if those same women had been given the support they needed, the education they needed to do what is best, perhaps they would have been able to continue.